My daughter was accused of cheating on a college course final. She states she didn't do it. The evidence is damning but not conclusive (a record of her accessing a class website during the test).Cognitive factors in learning my daughter claims she was studying on her cell until the test started and then stuck her phone in her back pocket during the test and perhaps inadvertently re-opened the site.Cognitive factors in learning she wants to fight the charge, and I said I would support her whatever she chose to do.

My problem is that there were 7 children in my family when I was growing up, and I was close to the bottom.Cognitive factors in learning I got blamed for a lot of stuff I didn't do by my older brothers and sisters, and my stepmother would usually just accept that I was at fault and punish me without listening to me.Cognitive factors in learning to do her justice, I think she was just too tired to figure out who was really to blame unless there was proof.

On one hand, when we discuss this, she seems to desperately need someone to believe in her - tears in her eyes, talk of dropping out - and she's not a dramatic, passionate person as a rule.Cognitive factors in learning I don't want to yank away my support from her, both due to the small chance that she may be telling the truth, and my belief that everyone needs someone to believe in them.Cognitive factors in learning

Others would say that part of having your kids' back is being a reality check in preparing them for the world, and that it does a disservice to them to totally remove skepticism and accountability if your gut tells you those are warranted. (and goodness knows, I could fill a years' worth of chats with people whose parents gave them blind faith against their better judgment ...Cognitive factors in learning and it totally led them astray.)

This comes down to your personality and your relationship and your history. No two parents would treat this the same way, and that's okay.Cognitive factors in learning in my own personal opinion, I think there's reason to give her the benefit of the doubt given what you describe of her history and her behavior. (but I also say, the whole "my rear end accessed the course site" doesn't inspire the highest of confidence — though it's not out of the question there was a mistake in the professor's records.)

cognitive factors in learning

My hedge: "I will support you in this, whatever you choose to do. I will choose to believe you because this is what you are telling me, and our trust is very important to me.Cognitive factors in learning I also know that life is complicated and I hope you know I love you no matter what. I am always going to be here, no matter what happens, and I hope we can have the kind of relationship where even in the complications, we can get through them together and trust each other."

Cognitive factors in learning

For the last several years, I've felt a decreasing connection with a group of women that I had originally brought together for a book club in 2004.Cognitive factors in learning we would meet about 5-6 times a year for lunch and an afternoon of discussion. By 2010, we no longer read and discussed books (too many difficulties selecting them), so we evolved to a lunch bunch in one another's homes.Cognitive factors in learning one member died in 2014, and another retired to FL the next year. Of the 5 women remaining, I am the most distant, being 35-45 miles (one way) from the rest.Cognitive factors in learning we meet for a restaurant lunch at a half-way point about twice a year. We are all in our 70's and have various chronic medical issues. But the larger problem for me is the fact that our political and religious differences seem to be bigger barriers to maintaining our connection.Cognitive factors in learning BTW, I am the only one with a husband since 2 are widows and 2 are divorced. My question — should I just stop participating? One recently called me to say she couldn't find the time to email me b/c she was so busy with her real estate work.Cognitive factors in learning that was off-putting since she and I had been close for 30 plus years. Sigh...

I found it very hurtful to read last week's chat about the husband who refuses to wear his hearing aids.Cognitive factors in learning the OP said that the husband "has hearing aids which were specifically and personally fitted to be comfortable for him, but he refuses to wear them." you characterized the husband's refusal disparagingly as "he no wanna wear them."Another chatter, talking about a different deaf person, said that the person "had started turning on closed captioning" as if that were a bad thing.Cognitive factors in learning obviously, I cannot know the personal circumstances of either of these deaf people, but I can tell you with 100% certainty that for some of us who have been prescribed hearing aids, THEY ARE PAINFUL TO WEAR, despite supposedly being "personally fitted to be comfortable." also, for many of us, they simply don't do much to improve our understanding of speech.Cognitive factors in learning I no longer wear hearing aids, after decades of misery wearing them (and many thousands of dollars spent on audiologists and hearing aids), and it is deeply hurtful to see comments suggesting that people like me are just being difficult for no good reason.Cognitive factors in learning I'm grateful to my family for being kinder and more sympathetic, and joining me in learning sign language. With sign language, we have been able to enjoy many long conversations, and no one is frustrated or miserable.Cognitive factors in learning sign language may not work for everyone, and for some it may be better to explore speech-to-text software or other options. Closed captioning obviously won't help with conversations, but is a huge help with understanding TV and is well worth turning on.Cognitive factors in learning what won't work is disparaging people who have given hearing aids a try and found them to be a nightmare.

For your guest! My son died recently.Cognitive factors in learning I feel like I have become an advocate for bereaved parents in our relentlessly happy culture, meaning that I am comfortable speaking up. But there are some elusive questions.Cognitive factors in learning like: if I really want to answer "terrible, thanks for asking," to a friend who keeps starting phone conversations with "how are you?" I have tried to convey my discomfort with being asked this question and I genuinely don't know if it is a real question or that tic that people use as a grating.Cognitive factors in learning but I dread it and I really want to answer with the title of your podcast. My other question: I have accepted a fundamental fact about grieving, that one loses friends and gains or strengthens new and old ones.Cognitive factors in learning I have cut loose (in my mind) my very oldest friend who decided to not be here for me (for whatever reasons). I think of our friendship as a boat that has become unmoored and drifted away forever.Cognitive factors in learning maybe she will bring it back and then I can decide what to do but otherwise, gone. But I have a nagging urge to tell her that she has been a terrible friend.Cognitive factors in learning not in a nasty way but just here is a sour fact. The more time that passes, the less important this is but it still makes me disappointed and angry.Cognitive factors in learning just keep letting it go or say something? (therapist recommended letting it go and that is my inclination, yet...)

My ex husband and I divorced almost 2 decades ago.Cognitive factors in learning he is single and I have been with a wonderful new partner for six years. I don’t have much contact with my ex except by email. We get along cordially when we are in the same room, such as at my daughter’s wedding.Cognitive factors in learning now my other daughter is pregnant and does not want to share this news with her dad. She refuses to discuss it and won’t tell me why she doesn’t want him to know.Cognitive factors in learning of course he’s going to find out at some point, particularly after the baby is born. I feel he’s going to be very hurt by not having this knowledge and it also puts my other daughter and I in an awkward position because we know we are hiding something.Cognitive factors in learning

For context, I should add that my daughter got along well with her father while the marriage was still intact. As she got older I think she began to resent him for having been out of work for so long and for being so negative.Cognitive factors in learning for many years I was the breadwinner and worked my tail off. Any suggestions? I have offered to share the news with him myself but she said no.Cognitive factors in learning

I read a lot so there may not be any new tips, but would appreciate any suggestions for self-care. I try to get exercise, healthy food (& some treats), and some social times with friends, but I know I'll need more coming up...Cognitive factors in learning I work full time in a demanding job with a long commute (think gone 6-6 most days), my husband stays home with our 6 & 3 year olds, so he needs a break when I get home and the kids want mommy. (3 year old has been in a mommy phase for months so the minute I get home he's at my side as long as he's awake.)

cognitive factors in learning

I already work, manage our family finances and paperwork/ school/ appointments, manage an elderly relatives' finances long distance (mostly automated now).Cognitive factors in learning for the last few years, I've been helping elderly parents 8 hours away with some finances, researching anything they need, and monitoring the health/ appointments/ medications of my dad who has a lot of health conditions.Cognitive factors in learning we also visit twice a year when we do any physical work around the place they can't. Now, dad is diagnosed with cancer and has been given a year to live without treatment; he hasn't decided what he wants to do, and his overall health is so bad I don't think he's have much longer even with treatment.Cognitive factors in learning so now I'm trying to plan additional visits, when he's up for it, and help my parents work through what he needs and wants. When he passes, my mom will stay where they live, but will require some substantial help at first with a big estate sale for all his stuff, and generally adjusting to life alone.Cognitive factors in learning

I'll be able to take time off as needed from my job, but getting through day-to-day - what can help as I get through this next year? I got the news about the timeline yesterday (I've known it was cancer for a couple weeks) and yesterday I was upset but functioning.Cognitive factors in learning today I'm barely functioning, and I know things are not going to get easier. Any tips to keep pushing through the busy life with kids and a demanding job, without going into a mental freeze, or breaking down at work?Cognitive factors in learning

I used to work as a student advisor at a university. Your daughter should definitely appeal the cheating charge. Some profs are stickier than others when it comes to charges of academic dishonesty.Cognitive factors in learning there is likely a process to follow for an appeal, which she can get information about from the office of the dean. She should assemble whatever support she can find to help her through this process — likely there is a student assistance office where she could talk to people knowledgeable about the process who could make suggestions.Cognitive factors in learning for example, can she remember whether someone writing beside her at the exam might be able to state they did not see her checking her phone?Cognitive factors in learning could she gather any evidence about "butt-dial" events that have happened to others, to show that this might have happened? Was there information on the webpage which would actually have helped her in writing this specific exam, or is the ban against checking the webpage just an overall rule?Cognitive factors in learning if worst comes to worst, and they are threatening to fail her in the class, could she offer to re-take the exam to demonstrate that did knows the material and did not need to cheat?Cognitive factors in learning hope this is helpful. And mom, believe her — if she actually had cheated, she wouldn't be so upset.

To the chatter whose boyfriend is in AA, my partner is also in AA and has been sober for six years.Cognitive factors in learning in helping new people, he often counsels a higher level of meetings & service positions per week in the first year+ than is sustained afterward.Cognitive factors in learning assuming your boyfriend already has a home group, I would listen to his feedback about the various meetings and service positions that he holds.Cognitive factors in learning he may find that home group plus one or two really impactful meetings a week is a sustainable balance. There will always be the random sponsor-sponsee meetings to read, the calls at night and any time (letting those intrude on your time together is another negotiation altogether) and the quarterly or annual conferences or meetings.Cognitive factors in learning you don't mention how long you've been together, but unfortunately, as a partner, there's little you can do (or should do) to influence his idea of what the proper 'balance' is.Cognitive factors in learning however, you can talk about your needs. Is he not contributing around the house and that's affecting your relationship? Another tradition of AA is that the goal of AA is to allow the alcoholic to live an active and fulfilling life.Cognitive factors in learning if he's not showing up for the rest of his life because of his time commitments in the program, you can listen and help him work through what he sees his long-term balance as resembling and go from there.Cognitive factors in learning

After the last rehab stint (there were a few) it was like a switch was flipped in my then husband. He went from being addicted to drugs and alcohol to being addicted to AA.Cognitive factors in learning attending a meeting every day, sometimes multiple times a day. That graduated to running meetings. Taking on multiple sponsors. He refused to do *anything* with his family - his sobriety came first.Cognitive factors in learning I'm talking about things like going out to dinner together with his kids. Or to the movies. He went to work, he went to AA, and the rest of the time he was on the couch, outside smoking, or on the phone with someone from AA.Cognitive factors in learning his idea of family time was to take the kids with him to an AA meeting. We went to a therapist specialized in addiction for almost a year but he refused to see what he was doing to us.Cognitive factors in learning I supported him best I could, and I stayed with him through that tentative first year of sobriety but he made it crystal clear that this was his life now, he had no plans on making any changes, and I had to accept it.Cognitive factors in learning I didn't, and now he's the ex. He still doesn't do anything with his kids.